Yes, there is a ‘No’

How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?

“I have a few sick leaves left and I am planning to take them. Since I will submit my resignation within a month or two at most, I think it would be better to take the leaves now before they pressurise me to complete the pending work at hand and also train my replacement. So, Thursday, let’s head out, road trip, me, you and our wives, what say?” said my childhood friend Ashwin



I looked at his face which showed high expectation of a positive answer and said, “No, I have work to do.”



The expression on his face changed to that of disappointment and maybe there was a bit of sadness somewhere in there. He tried to convince me in several ways, including, “You can take some of your work there and do it.”



“I don’t take work on trips and I don’t go on trips when I have work,” I said and it was true, I am one of those people who likes to focus on one thing at a time. I enjoy my work but I don’t take any of it into my time of recreation, in that particular time period, I don’t attend professional calls or reply to mails. But when I am working, one better not interrupt me with anything that is not related to my work.



I wasn’t always this person, there was a time when if someone asked me to go on a trip or anywhere, even to the nearby coffee shop I would leave everything and go. I guess the acceptance meant a lot to me back then, I wasn’t serious about what I wanted from life, it was a ‘I would just float and flow along this river of life’ phase.



But slowly and eventually I realised, people were serious about their life, their work, their professions and they would say ‘no’ all the time when I asked them to spare some time to come out and have an exchange of a few words.



By the time I became more focussed with my profession, I noticed the disappointments after the ‘no’ I had to say. I have even said ‘no’ without work just to let people know that I am not that same person anymore who would always get up and come. Some of my friends had even asked me to throw the phone away, since my frequency of making and receiving calls had both reduced by a huge percentage.



“It’s for attention, right? I mean everyone is curious now; what you are really doing in all that time you say you have work. I think it’s an attempt to make yourself important,” said one of my friends Ajit one day



‘Important?’ I thought, ‘I do love a little appreciation for my work, but do I want to be important? Not really, wouldn’t want the writer inside me to be mindful of such things’. No, I did not tell the words of this thought to my friend, I stayed silent, which he thought was also a part of me trying to be ‘important’.



I honestly am never that busy, I do work for long hours, not out of any pressure but because I enjoy it, with a free mind. I am a writer, content creator, and I like creating content mostly through words and reviewing what I have done again and again. The experimentation, the pursuit of becoming better, it’s a very enjoyable experience and I do it for myself. I love my breaks as well, as it gives me time to practise my most cherished hobbies ‘photography’ & ‘videography’.



So, saying ‘no’ is absolutely important, sometimes far more important than any form of ‘yes’. If you have a goal, keep that ‘no’ ready because there will always be someone who has done his/her work, is free now and definitely wants you to leave your work and follow through with his/her plan of the free time.

Written by Anuran Chatterji

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