As the metro train came to a halt. People rushed out and people rushed in. Everyone who rushed in scattered and found a place for himself/herself to sit or stand. Those who were already inside made adjustments according to the additions and subtractions. However, there was a pair of eyes that refused to move.
Sirak stared out, something had caught his eyes. Something that wasn’t here before, something he shouldn’t have seen. It was one of the most disastrous things to occur in his life. Right there, it was standing at his face, pulling towards itself all his thoughts. It does happen, what we want to avoid arrives right there in front of us.
Sirak had made a serious effort the past few months to keep himself away from this harm, and it had been a harm in true sense. He had been unable to keep himself away from it, time and again flying away back to this addiction. It kept eating away at his health and his savings. Many call it a symptom of depression, but Sirak wondered if he had any. Except for his apparent addiction, most people gave him high scores on all other fronts.
Its presence shone in his eyes, as he stood in the metro train. He didn’t mind the push of people and was completely unaware of the frustration on people’s faces.
He had held for as long as he could, the day was tiring, there was endless work to be done the next day. Would it be such an evil to allow himself this one moment, will it not be good for the heart instead to give in to this want.
It wouldn’t happen again, the mind explained, ignoring that it shouldn’t happen that day as well. He was going for it, Sirak moved, pushing through the passengers ignoring the uncomfortable groans; for the open doors he headed but, on his presence, they closed and Sirak looked out for the last time that day at the new fast-food joint. Perhaps it was a sign from above, his mind said. But life would certainly last more than this moment and day the want will return.
Written by Anuran Chatterji
Early Morning Memories 